Planning for the Unthinkable, Part 2

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A few months ago I shared a post about the importance of life insurance. Perhaps even more important than life insurance is a will. Just as with life insurance, I started thinking about a will because of my oldest son’s special needs. I knew that not just anyone could take care of him. My husband and I needed to make sure he would be in the hands of someone capable and informed. Even above and beyond my eldest son’s special circumstances, both of my children are too valuable to leave their futures in the hands of the government and the whims of some court or judge. The likelihood of my husband and me both passing at the same time is small, but it was not something I wanted to leave to chance. My husband and I decided a will was of vital importance for our family.

There are various benefits to composing a will. The two main benefits of having a will are allocating assets and caring for your dependent children in the event of both spouses (parents) passing. I will mainly focus on will aspects that relate to the care of your children. There are many factors to discuss and consider when forming a will. Below are some items you may consider when writing a will for the benefit of your children.

Beneficiaries

For most of you reading this post, beneficiaries will be a no-brainer – your children. However, you may also consider contingent beneficiaries such as charities, friends, or organizations in the event of no immediate, surviving family members. You will also need to decide the allocation of your assets if you have more than one beneficiary. The allocation of your assets to your beneficiaries is determined in terms of percentage. In addition, if you want specific items (heirlooms, jewelry, keepsakes, etc.) to go to specific beneficiaries, it should be outlined in your will.

Choose a Guardian

American judge
maveric2003 / Foter / CC BY

If you have children, choosing a guardian is of utmost importance. If a guardian is not appointed and both parents are deceased, a judge or court will decide on a guardian for the children. For my husband and me, choosing a guardian took the most thought when preparing our will. A guardian may be a single person or a couple. When selecting a guardian it may be important to consider worldview, parenting style, values, age, and health. These factors are vital to weigh since the guardian(s) will essentially be taking over your role as parent. In addition, you may want to consider financial skills. It is important to make sure the guardian will be able to adequately care for your child(ren) financially. You may choose to separate the role of personal and estate guardian, but the personal guardian still needs to be financially savvy to ensure the well-being of you children. An alternate guardian should be selected in the event the primary guardian is unable to assume the role. Once you have decided on your choices for a guardian, obtain their consent before completing your will.

Choose an Executor

An executor is someone who makes sure the terms of your will are carried out. The executor may also be your chosen guardian. You may choose to compensate an executor. If you choose to compensate your executor, terms of compensation should be outlined in your will.

Will Location

It is important to keep your will in a safe, known location. My husband and I decided to keep our will in a bank safety deposit box. We then informed our chosen guardians/executors of its location so they know how to access it if necessary. If your will cannot be found, it cannot be executed.

Special Instructions

Quality time
kevin dooley / Foter / CC BY

Although my husband and I both personally know the guardians we selected for our children, we still attached a special note of instruction to our will. Our eldest son has extra cares, doctors, and medical issues above and beyond that of a typically developing child. It is hard for anyone outside of myself and my husband to keep track of all his extra needs. I compiled instructions to ensure the transition of his care would be as smooth as possible. This document is not part of the will, but is kept with our will for easy access. We also gave a copy of these documents to the guardians. I plan to update the documents as necessary. You may also want to write a letter with instructions if you have any special circumstances (a child with special needs) or special requests (specifics about how you would like your children to be raised).

Life is short and unpredictable. A will may bring you assurance that your children will be well cared for in the event of your absence. Have you made sure your children will be well cared for through the security of a will if the unthinkable happened to your family?

Disclaimer: All thoughts expressed in this piece are the opinion of the author. A lawyer can help you better understand your specific needs pertaining to a will.

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Amber Flinn
Amber is a central Iowa native. Amber has been married to her best friend Tommy since 2007. Amber feels she has the best job in the world, being a stay at home mom to her two boys, Miles (August 2009) and Graham (May 2012). On any given day you may find Amber in her pajamas past noon, ignoring a couch piled high with clean laundry and a sticky kitchen floor desperate for a scrubbing. Much of Amber’s joy and fulfillment comes from serving her family. Amber is passionate about advocating for her son Miles and other children with special needs. Amber is currently learning and enjoying what it means to raise a healthy infant with her son Graham. Besides loving on her family, Amber enjoys ethnic foods, nerdy strategy and card games, lazy days, and good books.

4 COMMENTS

  1. I strongly agree with this. Thanks for sharing, Amber! My husband and I realized the importance of this after my dad passed suddenly. It’s awful to think about, but it is a responsibility of ours as parents.

    • Erica, so glad you and your husband understand the value of wills. Honestly, it wasn’t even a thought in my mind until I saw how fragile life is due to our son’s medical issues. It seems a lot of people just don’t think about it until its too late. I’m thankful that our experiences helped me to see the importance of a will.

    • Jamie,
      My husband and I have something called legal shield for all of our legal needs (small business issues, will, etc). Legal shield is a service that partners with local quality provider law firms. The local law firm that we used via legal shield is McEnroe, Gotsdiner, Brewer & Steinbach P.C.. Making a will through legal shield was very affordable for us. Hope this helps!

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