An Open Letter to My Daughter: Five Truths I Want You to Know

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An Open Letter to My Daughter: Five Truths I Want You to KnowThere are a lot of things I know now that I wish I’d known growing up as a girl in this world. And there are a lot of things I am still learning that I am sure someday I will wish I could tell myself as a new mom.

I’ll be honest – before I became pregnant, I was nervous about the idea of having a girl. Because being a girl isn’t easy. Knowing the doubts and insecurities I faced as a young girl, I feared you would experience the same.

My heart aches at the thought of you experiencing heartache.

I know I cannot protect you from these things, but I can help shape the confidence you have as a woman. As your mom, it is my hope that you will see in my actions and behaviors the type of woman you want to be (and not the woman you don’t want to be!). And as your parents, it is your father’s and my goal to instill in you the values that will carry you through, providing you the guidance you need to be a confident, strong girl.

If I could impress the most important truths and values on your heart, I would want you to know these things:

You are beautiful. Even in your awkward pre-teen years, when acne settles in, or on days when you just want to wear sweatpants, you are beautiful. You are beautiful because of who you are. You are not beautiful because of a dress size or perfectly clear skin. Beauty doesn’t come from binge diets or the latest workout fad. Beauty radiates from within you. Don’t waste your time striving for a perfect appearance. Strive to be your best self by being healthy, taking care of yourself, and loving who you are. Then you will know the true beauty that is within you.

You are loved. I tell you I love you every day, and I will never stop. You are so loved by me and your daddy, and by a God who loves you more than this world and created you just as you are. There will be days in your life when you feel alone, and that is a lie that comes from this world and keeps us from experiencing the joy and love of those around us. No matter what you may experience in life, you will never be alone. You will always be loved. And nothing will ever change that.

You matter. Your feelings matter. Your life matters. Even as a girl. Especially as a girl. Women matter. We have just as much to contribute. We are not any less because we are women. No one can take away your dignity. A confident woman, filled with grace, can accomplish just about anything. Don’t ever let yourself believe that you are not good enough. You are more than enough. You are worth fighting for.

You can do it. Whatever you set your heart to. And don’t let anyone tell you otherwise. It’s easy to let self-doubt settle in and to convince yourself someone else is better qualified, or that you’re just not good enough. You are good enough. (See above.) Don’t be afraid to go after your dreams. Be ambitious. Make mistakes. Learn. And try again. Don’t give up. Believe in yourself and know that no matter what you may think or feel, you have what it takes.

You are perfect just as you are. Don’t try to be someone you’re not for someone else. Don’t settle for less than what you want or what you have to give. The comparison game starts young and can follow you into adulthood, and even motherhood. It’s a trap filled with lies and can consume you if you let it. Life is too short to worry about what other people think. Live your life with conviction, and trust your heart. Communicate and love others with grace, but don’t feel like you have to live up to others’ expectations. You can respect opinions without catering to everyone. Don’t change yourself for someone else. God created you in His image. Trust and follow His guidance and expectations.

There are many lessons I have learned in life, and these are the truths that hold the most value in my heart. It is my hope and my prayer that you will see these values in me and will keep them in your heart as well.

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