We all love our kids. We love them so much that even though we have to endure all of these things, we still scoop them up and love on them any chance we get. But let’s be real. Some things are awful — I mean, really bad.
10. Bodily Fluids
Poop, pee, vomit, snot. All of these things on your couch, your shirt, your kid. Cleaning up after these is no one’s idea of a good time. Can we just Lysol the house and run away?
9. Cooking Multiple Meals
“Look, Mommy made a delicious casserole. It has all the things you like in it.” And will your kid eat it? Nope. So, what do you do? Sometimes you have to make a different dinner for the kids. I do this more than I’d like to admit, but there is no way my three-year-old is eating salad with grilled chicken.
8. Bath Time
Ugh. Sometimes this is great. But sometimes bath time is a ridiculous way to get water and soap poured all over the floor.
7. Nail Clipping
I hate clipping nails. Hate. My kids hate it when I clip their nails. I’ve tried filing them down, but I don’t have an extra three hours to be sitting and filing a toddler’s nails. So usually a bribe has to take place.
6. Stuff
Seriously. How can these kids have so much stuff? Where did all of these toys come from? And why are they everywhere? Under the bed, in the kitchen cupboards, in my makeup drawer…. These kids need less “stuff.”
5. Bedtime
Do I need to say anything about this? We just pushed our bedtime to 7 p.m. for both kids because they are taking forever to get to sleep. Too early? Nope. They need sleep and Mommy needs wine.
4. Tantrums
These have hit an all-time high at our house. Full on throwing themselves on the floor, screaming, crying. And usually it’s over things like, “I wanted the blue cup,” or “I wanted to eat that crayon.” Serenity now.
3. Children’s Shows
Calliou. Need I say more? But honestly, there are very few things I despise more than children’s television shows. How many times can I watch Curious George try to get the Man with the Yellow Hat to work on time?
2. I Can’t Have Nice Things
Children break everything. They take things and throw them on the ground. My tableside lamp? Broken. Bluetooth speakers? In the toilet. Favorite necklace? Down the cool air vent.
1. Sleep Deprivation
And the absolute worst thing? Not sleeping. You never know how much you love and need sleep until you aren’t getting any sleep. We’ve all been the zombies walking through the days after getting three hours of broken sleep. I hope your coffee is strong. You’re going to need it.
As your mother, all I can say is “this too shall pass”…but oh I remember each and every one on your list.