My kids call me the Talking Mom.
I have earned the title fairly.
You see, I’ve had very good role models from whom I learned these skills.
My parents were talking parents, too, and I am quite sure I got it from them.
When I was a kid, I hated it when my parents would linger and talk!
Here’s how it always happened:
- My sisters and I would be ready to leave an event.
- My parents would say they were on the way to the car, only to get completely caught up in a conversation.
- Finally, we got a little closer to the door to leave…then we were stopped by someone else with a question or another discussion.
We would try everything to get their attention and let them know we were done, ready to go, bored, or frustrated by the lack of movement toward the car.
And yet, here I am doing the exact same thing I hated, to my kids.
I get it, boys. I do. I remember my exasperation clearly.
So, I’m sorry.
It’s because I like to talk.
I guess I have always liked to talk.
I kinda liked it when parent/teacher conferences rolled around because I did pretty well in school. I would always get accolades about my test scores and such. But, the one thing I dreaded was I knew my teachers would discuss my tendency to “socialize.”
Every conference, that word came up. Socialize.
It kinda makes me cringe to hear that word, even to this day.
But it’s accurate, I guess. It’s what I do.
I am very much a people person. I love making connections, hearing the latest news from my friends, and letting people into my life. The classic extrovert.
However, my kids now have the extreme pleasure of dealing with me as the Talking Mom. This means we are usually the last to leave church, or Single Moms Group, or school events.
So, while I realize this is something I should work on, I am also choosing to use it to teach my kids patience.
Their tendency is to try and grab my attention in negative ways. Pulling on me, talking over me or another adult, or roughhousing amongst themselves.
Although I can empathize with their situation and remember vividly my sisters and I doing the same thing, these are not behaviors I want to see in my kids. I am choosing to use this as a tool to teach them manners and the proper way to get an adult’s attention if they’re in a conversation. These are life-skills that will serve them well.
Most of my friends know that my kids call me the Talking Mom, and they are now enlisted in helping me to cut my conversations short, when needed. But I’ve also asked them to help me enforce rules about manners and interrupting.
I’ll always be a Talking Mom, but it doesn’t have to be a negative thing.
And, because history often repeats itself, chances are my boys will be talking dads, and they will have kids who will need a lesson in patience, as well. When that happens, I will be able to give them my sympathies and a little advice on how to deal with them.