I’m sorry I didn’t protect you.
I’m sorry I didn’t see the signs of fear and terror in your eyes.
I’m sorry. As your mother, I’m sorry I didn’t protect you better. It’s my job — to protect you — and I failed.
Yes, she might not have hit you or “abused” you in a physical sense, but you were certainly abused. The emotional belittling, the shouting, and the verbal berating took a toll on you. The mean words that came out of our daycare provider’s mouth tore you down and made you afraid of every adult who raised his or her voice at you. You were afraid of your parents and your grandparents, the people who love you best. I’m so sorry. I should have seen the signs.
When you, a normally chipper and outgoing kiddo, started cowering and becoming timid and fearful, I should have known. I should have known when you cried every morning before dropping you off at daycare that something was wrong. I should have known that when we drove past her street and you asked in fear if we were going to daycare that things were just not right.
It took a concerned stranger who observed you and our daycare provider out in public for us to finally confirm our suspicions. Instead of helping build you up and helping you become the bright-eyed kiddo you have since become, she made you afraid of every adult you encountered. It took a long time for the fear to leave your eyes.
While you don’t remember this person because you were only two years old, I do. I’m here today to share our story.
Working moms live in a world where we must leave our beloved children in the care of someone else every day. It is my fervent hope that these daycare providers would love our children in the same way we would.
Things to consider in avoiding an abusive daycare situation:
1. Trust your instincts.
2. Check references.
3. Observe what your child isn’t telling you because maybe they don’t know how.
4. Above all: KNOW your child. If something seems “off” or “wrong,” ask questions.
Your daycare provider spends 8+ hours ALONE with your child every day.
Dear reader, please don’t let this story become your story. If you can’t trust your daycare provider with your most precious gift, then what can you trust them with?
